should your boyfriend move to live with you If he doesn’t move there will it affect you relationship in a negative way? It’s always about the context that he (and you) are able/willing/capable of creating. If this is going to ‘suck’ it will. If this is going to ‘put a strain on your relationship’ it will. If this is going to be ‘the most romantic time of your life’ it will be. If this is ‘the adventure of a lifetime’ it will be. A context is NOT an already existing thing that is out there that you wander into. A context is construct of language that you create to hold all of the content. It is not a belief, that follows later. It is created/made up and lived in to by you and the others around you. If I had enough time I could give you thousands of examples that you have witnessed. I have never met you and I could give you a couple that you have done already. There was no history or basis or proof for what you declared and yet it became part of you and your life. People that believe life sucks – have a sucky life. People that believe life is an adventure – have adventuresome lives. The common wisdom though says that the context already exists and we are just reporting on the truth. i.e. Life sucks! I promise you this is not the way that it ‘IS’. As you go through life it helps if you exercise this muscle of creating context so that when you come to a really important  episode like this one you kick major butt. Rather than another degree or accomplishment for your resume, spend some quality time developing a life long commitment of being a master of promise, declaration, commitment, creation. All of these are phenomena of language are are ALWAYS  and ONLY at your control. I know it doesn’t look this way, but trust me; if you take an honest and rigorous look it life you will see it everywhere. And this is what makes life Work (with a capital W). In addition you can create a context here and then you get to enroll him in your more interesting context and get him to give up on his more mundane context. This may also be a challenge. Or not. Depends on the context you create for enrolling him. Living life fully is a full time job. You are so lucky that you get one to work with.